Thursday, June 07, 2007

Paticus' Past Volume Six: The Search

That's right, it's time to detail one of my run-ins with the law. There have not been that many, and they have all been rather benign, but this one is kind of a fun story.

Let's see, it's the summer of '88, I believe. We had just graduated from high school, or we were on the verge of graduating from high school, I'm not sure. That summer is kind of a smoky haze, if you catch my drift, heh-heh. (What I meant is we were smoking a lot of pot. Had you gotten that ? I just wanted to be sure, because I realized that you might have thought there may have been problems with wildfires in Northern New Jersey that summer, and I wouldn't want you to think that I would find that funny. Because I wouldn't. I don't think wildfires are funny. Not at all. In fact, that song "Wildfire" by Michael Martin Murphy always makes me cry, though that's about a ghostly horse named Wildfire, not about an actual fire.)

Anyway, summer of '88,lots of pot smoking. Heh-Heh. Let's move on.

I'm pretty sure it was Sunday night, because NOTHING was open. And me and my friends D & J were out cruising around in my '84 Monte Carlo, driving around our little Northern New Jersey town. It was summer,as I had mentioned, so we had the windows open(ahem..importantplotdevice-ahem). We were driving down Knickerbocker Road, and we were approaching the light at Tenafly Road-the light was yellow, but I sped up a little bit so I could make the left turn before the light changed. As that light changed, so did life as we knew it.

Okay, that was a bit over dramatic, sorry about that. What did happen is, as we turned onto Tenafly Road, we noticed a cop car coming towards us. We all looked at each other- had he seen the turn ? If he did, would he really care ? I didn't actually run the red light or anything. We would soon have our answer.

In the back seat, my friend D says(just as the police car passes us) "Oh great, a PIG !!" J and I froze. Remember when I said that the windows were open ?This is where that becomes an important part of the story. Out of the corner of my eye, I see that the police car's windows are ALSO open.

As I glance into the rear view mirror, I am thinking,"Surely what D said sounded louder in the car. I'm sure they didn't..." before I can finish my thought, I see the police car hit the intersection and hang a u-turn.

I'm sure that my inner dialogist tried to tell me that it was simply a coincidence, but then the lights and siren came on. I had just turned another corner at a gas station, so I pulled over, still holding to the slim hope that they had gotten a call on the radio, and they would fly on past me.
Nope, they stopped behind me. Oh boy.

" Could I see your license and registration, please son."

"Yes sir." I gave him my license and registration.

"Would you all step out of the car, please ?"

We all get out of the car. by the time we get out of the car, there are 3 more cop cars parked and about 6 more cops standing around.

"Is this your car ?" he asks me.

"yes sir. It's my parents car."

"Is there anything illegal in the car ?"

"No sir, there isn't."

"Do you mind if we take a look ?

"No sir, I don't." At this time, I am very glad that we were in the middle of about a week long "dry spell" so none of us had anything on us. And since my parents did drive the car as well, I never left anything in it. So I was pretty sure we were in the clear on that front. Of course, that did not stop my fertile imagination from seeing the guy finding a stem or a seed or something.

The other cops lined us up and took my friends licenses as well. I don't think they ever searched us.

I made the mistake of putting my hands in my pockets, and I got yelled at for that. then one of the cops walked over to me.

" I know you. You're Nick's kid." This was the moment I dreaded. The recognition. My Dad had been a cop. And was still friendly with all the cops in our town." Do you think he'd appreciate a call right now ?"

"No sir, I doubt that he would." He grinned at me. I turned my attention to the cops going through my car. I don't remember if one of us asked, but it came time for them to tell us why they were searching the car. It turned out they were searching for weapons.

Weapons. okay. It seems that they heard my friend yell "something" and then "go for his feet", so they were not sure what we might have had on the floor. They let us get back in the car, and the first cop gave me back my license and registration and said: "Pay attention to lights."

And that was that.

Now, I cannot know if they felt a real threat from us or not. Perhaps they did. But I always kind of figured that they heard a little shit yell "pig" out the window and decided to fuck with us a little bit.

Quite frankly, I didn't really care. At the time, I was just happy they didn't call my Dad.

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