Wednesday, October 06, 2010

Paticus' Past, Volume 18: That Neil Diamond Song Used To Scare The Hell Outta Me.

That's right, guys and gals, it's time to climb into the wayback machine and take a swim in old Lake Paticus.

  Let's go back to 1980, maybe 1981. A cute little ten year old with a fairly active imagination who goes by the name of Paticus is fast asleep in his bed.

  Paticus has been asleep for a few hours, and he is experiencing a dream state now...More accurately, a nightmare.And yes, I do still remember the details of the nightmare. Yours truly is being chased through an old apartment building(or actually a sitcom depiction of old apartment buildings, I think my subconscious constructed it out of  memories of "Good Times" and "The Jeffersons) by this creature with an alligator's head who was chomping the heads off of everyone in sight. It was a pretty bloody and disturbing dream.

  Just as GatorHead was closing in on me(I was cowering behind a couch{plaid, of course}), I woke up. Two things happened when I woke up.

  First: My pants were thrown over the foot-board of my bed, and they looked EXACTLY like a silhouette of GatorHead. This scared the shit out of me(though I did respond by attacking my trousers and throwing them onto the floor).

    Second: "Love On The Rocks" by Neil Diamond was playing on the radio. For years afterward, hearing that song would fill me with that same feelings of dread that I felt when I saw those GatorHead pants on the foot-board of my bed. THAT'S how Neil Diamond used to scare the shit outta me.

  Even now, I prefer to listen to Neil Diamond in a well lit room whilst I am wide awake.

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