Wednesday, January 18, 2012

"The President's Neck is Missing!"(With a nod to "The Simpsons" for title and inspiration)

1/17/2019-At approximately 4:52 a.m., the President of the United States awoke to the horrifying discovery that his neck was missing!

  Thankfully, his head had been expertly re-attached to his shoulders by the thieves, and a check of his vital signs indicated that he was otherwise in good health. His staff was called to meet in his office(not the Oval one, but a more traditionally square office he kept nearer to his bedroom).

  Of course, due to his necklessness, he could not speak, but the communication problem was quickly remedied by giving the president a tablet device that would speak the words he typed.

  Thankfully, the President was a fan of deep v-neck  t-shirts, so it was fairly easy for him to find appropriate clothing.He chose a nice cobalt blue, his wife's favorite color.
The White House engineers were dispatched to create several new devices that the President would need: First and foremost was a cradle for his telephone, as he would no longer be able to cradle the phone between his shoulder and his ear, and he was never a fan of ear-pieces, but did need to be able to work hands-free. Second, and of less importance, was some sort of rear view mirror system,as the President will be unable to turn his head.
 The Chief of Security entered and linked to the security footage form  the President's bedroom. At approximately 1:45 a.m. EST, there appeared to be a shadowy figure carrying a bag of some sort moving around in the east end of the room,but the room was then bathed in a blinding light that lasted for the next 35 minutes. 

  When the light subsided, the room looked as if nothing had changed, except, of course, that the President's NECK was missing!!

  As they all looked at each other in disbelief, the telephone rang. the President answered,and a voice said "Mr. President, I believe I have something that belongs to you."

  To be continued...

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