Thursday, February 05, 2009

I'll Remember You...

I found out that a friend died yesterday. I found out that she died almost 4 years ago.

This has really knocked me back.We had always drifted in and out of contact, but she was one of those friends that no matter how long it had been since we had talked, we hit the ground running when we reconnected. I always knew that I would see her again. I just knew it. We would find each other again.

And I had recently started thinking that it would happen soon. We met our freshman year of college, and we were quickly very close. And I had recently started reconnecting with a lot of people from college, and I naturally just assumed that we would reconnect.

A couple of people asked me about her, so I decided to start searching for her in earnest. And yesterday, I found the one thing I honestly did not expect to find...Her obituary. It broke my heart. one of my friends that had asked about her told me that she had been sick, but I still did not expect to find that.

It's strange that you can miss someone so much that you had not talked to in years. But she was always there. I thought about her all the time. There were a lot of memories. I'd hear certain songs or think of things that had happened.And I always figured that one day we would talk about those things again.

She was simply one of the best. She was a lot of fun, but she would also listen, and give the advice that you needed to hear. Not just wanted to hear.

It's strange, I had this very vivid dream about finding her on Tuesday night. It was one of those amorphous, formless dreams...I think she was moving apartments, and there was a guy there that I met after college, when we lived in L.A., and then there were two people from my high school there as well...And everyone was very good friends. I'm not sure where we were, but it was like we had seen each other everyday for the last however many years, we were just chatting lightly and joking and everything. It would be nice to have had at least one more of those days.

I guess I'm writing this,to try and say goodbye. Here's a song that she introduced me to when we were freshman in college, and I think it's one of the more beautiful songs I have ever heard, and it seems appropriate.

So, goodbye, Kim...And I'm sorry that it has taken me four years to say it.


Jen said...

I will always remember her curly hair and her infectious smile. My lasting memory is sitting for hours at that diner in Westwood eating an enormous breakfast and talking about the future.

Jessica said...

I'm so sorry for your loss.

World of Julie said...

Oh, that stinks. I'm sorry.

Paticus said...

Jen- i remember that.

Jessica & julie- Thanks.