Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Dogs In Movie Theaters

Let me state something so that all cards are on the table:

I don't like most dogs.

I don't advocate their injury or anything, I'm just not a big fan. And I will admit that a lot of it probably traces back to dog owners. For instance, I can't really blame the dogs who shit all over the lawn behind our last apartment, making it unusable(is that a word ? I'm not sure, but I'm going with it.), it's really the owners who refuse to clean up after the dogs. there are a few exceptions, of course, but for the most part, I am not a dog fan.

I have also had a few run ins with dogs. When I was a kid with a paper route, there was a German Shepard named Sasha, who absolutely hated me. it used to bark and bark and leap at the fence it was behind. Now, before you say it, I did NOT tease the dog.I don't tease animals, whether I like them or not. No, this dog just did not like me. Perhaps it was because I was an intruder on their lawn and porch while I was delivering the newspaper ? Perhaps.

Allow me to set the scene. I am delivering my newspapers, which I do with a boom box on a guitar strap over my shoulder. The boom box was about this size:

I drop the paper on their front porch, and I hear the dog barking inside the house. I really don't think a whole lot about it until I hear the door open(for them to get the paper) and then I hear the two words that made my blood run cold..."SASHA NO!" I glanced over my shoulder, and sure enough, there was a very angry German Shepherd bounding down the steps toward me.

Now, I know that lots of people say "Don't run, that only makes them want to chase you." Well, at this point, the alternative was her EATING me, so I thought chasing was the lesser of two evils.

Let me tell you something, if you ever want to find out just how fast you can run, get chased by a large dog that really does not like you. This house was about a long block from my house, and I think that I, a fat kid, covered that distance in about half a second. okay, that is probably a slight exaggeration, but it was really fast. Faster than I ever would have thought my little butterball ass could go, that's for sure.

But I digress, what I wanted to tell you about today was our trip to the movies on Saturday night. My Special Lady and I went to see "The Wrestler". Which, by the way, is a phenomenal movie. Depressing ? Sure. But Mickey Rourke is un-fucking-believable in it. So is Marisa Tomei, by the way. And the Bruce Springsteen song, is just incredible.

We were sitting in our seats, waiting for the movie to start, uncomfortable silence between us, trying to not discuss the "incident" with the jalapeno peppers, when this lady walks up to our row and stops. I get up to let her enter the row, and I notice that she has a dog with her. A dog, at the movies. My first thought is ..."Oh, what the fuck ? A dog ? Who does this lady think she is?"
Then I figure that it is probably a helper dog(it better be), so I let the first thought go. It's a mutt looking dog, but seems pleasant enough...But it did STINK. As did the lady, by the way, and her movie companion, who showed up a few minutes later. the dog just smelled like dirty dog smell, but the people smelled some some sort of odd spice combination. I was, quite frankly, glad that My Special Lady had to sit closer to them than I did.

So, the dog was well behaved and all, but I couldn't help thinking this: If it is a helper/comfort dog, shouldn't they sit in one of the handicapped spots that have extra room next to, and around them ? Doesn't that make more sense than squeezing it in on the floor in front of a normal seat ?

Am i way off on this ? What do you think ?


sh said...

I realize that helper dogs assist people with a variety of needs. I also realize that people who cannot see a movie may still in their own ways enjoy the experience of going to a theatre to catch a show. But really, my first thought was, "A blind person at the movies?" My second thought was that anyone who needs physical (not visual) assistance probably would have been easily identified as such as she passed by/over you. And a dog helper dog in training should have had that special rigid leash. Me thinks someone snuck their mangy mutt into the movie.

Paticus said...

sh- don't they have "comfort dogs" too ? i thought such a thing existed for people with emotional problems and other ailments that might not be so visible-But you also may be right, she may have just snuck the dog in.